The Self-Love We All Deserve

WHO HERE LOVES TO DATE THEMSELVES?

A dear friend of mine takes herself on dates just her, herself, and her.
Hikes, movies, dinner, shopping whatever fills her cup. The basics, but intentional.

Before meeting her, I had never really thought about how much of a quality-of-life boost dating yourself can actually give you. Like, real-deal self-care, real-deal self-love.

She mentioned it casually during a conversation, and I was stumped. I’d heard of it, sure but no one ever really talks about actually doing it. I felt a little proud of her, a little jealous, and a lot like, Wow... I'm 27/28 and couldn’t even fathom the concept of alone time like that.

Any “me” time I did get, I’d spend trying to reconnect with my partner because our lives were always go-go-go—or I’d dedicate it to one-on-one time with one of the kiddos. I genuinely didn’t even realize it could be a thing to date yourself.

Now I’m 31... and I don’t think I’ve still made the intentional decision to take myself out on a proper solo date.
Wow.

Don’t get me wrong I’m not a super social butterfly to begin with. I love the people I love, and I also really love being alone. But meeting new people? Ugh. That’s where the fogged-up glasses and upper-lip sweat come in. It’s the worst.

I’m not a small talk girl, and I don’t care to become one.
My partner? He’s great at it. He thrives in those little chats with strangers, and I’m usually halfway down the aisle pretending to be busy while he works his conversational magic. I honestly don’t know how he doesn’t shrivel up when there's that awkward pause; I’d be mentally packing up my entire life while whispering “Okay bye… okay bye… okay bye” on a loop.

But seriously, as amazing as dating yourself sounds ... and truly, it is ... it takes intention. And I think that’s where so many of us get lost. Life demands a lot from us in adulthood, no matter your situation. It’s so easy to forget that we matter too, that we deserve the same attention and care we pour into others.

So if you're reading this, I hope you’re loving yourself loud and soft, fierce and gentle, in all the ways you need. And if you haven’t taken yourself on a date in a while or ever I hope this is your sign to try. Even if it’s just a walk with your favorite music in your ears. Even if it’s just coffee and silence. Make it yours.

Promise me you’ll take care of yourself the way you take care of everyone else.

Sending all the love your way. Coming from a mind of a mama.

xoxo,
Janessa